Made For Family Discipleship

“I’m not made for this.” I’m sure every parent has had this doubt at least once in their life especially when it comes to family discipleship. But the truth is that you were created for discipleship. Created for your children. Living at this moment in history. You are indeed, “Made For This!”

I absolutely love Psalm 139. It puts my life in perspective of God’s amazing knowledge and power. Though I think I am in control of my life and I think I’m writing my own story, this Psalm reminds me that God is the ultimate author of life, especially verse 16:

“Your eyes saw my unformed substance; in your book were written, every one of the, the days that were formed for me, when as yet there was none of them.”

Psalm 139:16, (ESV)

You Were Made For Your Family

Before you were even a spark in your parent’s eyes, God saw you. Before you were ever born, God saw every one of your days. He saw the burnt dinners. He saw the hard work. God saw as you struggled to get the kids where they needed to go. He saw every high and every low of your life, the laughter, and the tears. God saw you become a parent, whether blissful and easy or wrought with pain, struggle, and hardship. Parenthood (with all the successes and failures) does not surprise God.

He gave you your children, and even on the days you ask yourself, “Can I actually do this?” He knew you could when he first gave you a child. And He still knows you can today (because you are not alone – He is with you and helping you). He decided you were the best parent for your children – whether they came to you biologically, through foster or adoption, or any other way. God is the one who has written your story. He is the one who gave you the very breath you breathe. He is the author of your life’s story. And He made you for this.

You Are Called To Make Disciples in Your Home

Regardless of our title (parent, caregiver, pastor, accountant, etc) the Bible talks again and again about how we have a job in this world. We are given a mandate or a great commission to proclaim Christ’s excellence, to let our light shine so others will see Christ in us, and to make disciples.

1 Peter 2:9, tells us that we are chosen, holy, people of God so that we can proclaim Christ’s excellence.

In Matthew 5, we hear from Jesus himself that we are to let our light shine in all we do so others would see God’s glory through us. 

In Matthew 28, Jesus, speaking to his disciples, gives the great commission. Simultaneously, this is given to all disciples of Christ even today. We are to go and make disciples of all nations. We are told to teach them all of God’s ways and His truth – His commands.

Don’t neglect the mission field at home

In all of these verses, we can clearly see that we are to be witnesses to God’s power and love and make disciples. But, if you are anything like me, I tend to think all those things (service, evangelism & discipleship) take place outside my home. Now, missions trips and serving at our church or in our communities is a good thing, but they must not replace the mission field in our own homes. You can assess your view of ministry/missions and family with these questions:

• Do I view praying with and for my children the same way I view praying for others at the altar during a church service?
• Am I viewing feeding my children as loving as feeding the homeless?
• Do I share the gospel with my children? Do I tell them about all the times and ways I’ve experienced the goodness of God in my life in the same way I eagerly share with others? Am I too busy looking for a microphone or a platform, or do I see my children as God’s microphone to the next generation?
• Am I teaching them to obey God? Serve Him? Love Him?

Perfect isn’t possible

We are not trying to be perfect parents with perfect children (neither of these things are possible). Our goal in family discipleship is to proclaim Christ, glorify Christ, and teach Christ. God does this through us as we are faithful to our families and the opportunities that he gives us.

In Deuteronomy 6, we read this instruction, given to the Israelites by God:

“And these words that I command you today shall be on your heart. You shall teach them diligently to your children, and shall talk of them when you sit in your house, and when you walk by the way, and when you lie down, and when you rise.” Deuteronomy 6:6-7

Deuteronomy 6:6-7 (ESV)

Parents are responsible for family discipleship

There are two important things to notice in this passage. The first is this: God was telling the Israelites to disciple their children – to teach God’s commandments diligently to their children, to make sure they understood who God was and what He commanded. God was telling the Israelites that parents are responsible for discipling and teaching their children. When it comes to faith, parents are the primary source of teaching for their children.

But It’s so much easier when the children’s ministry teaches our kids. We drop them off once or maybe twice a week for crafts and bible stories and a great time. It’s easier for sure, but that’s not biblical, that’s not discipleship. You can take advantage of every VBS, Children’s program at church, and Sunday school available but those programs can only serve as a supplement. Programs are only a starting point for discipleship within your own home and family. If we want to disciple our children biblically we cannot simply take the easy way out. As a couple, my husband and I send our kids to Sunday school, VBS and kids programs all the time, and you can too if that’s what you’re in to. These things can be good, but they cannot replace family discipleship.

You cannot delegate your role as a disciple-maker of your children – you can only supplement it.

Family Discipleship Happens in Day To Day Living

The second thing to notice in this passage is not just what God told the Israelites to do (disciple their children), but how God told them to do it. Family discipleship happens at all times. When sitting at home, or out and about. When laying down (going to bed), and when rising (waking up). All the examples in these verses – sitting, walking, laying, waking – serve to tell us that discipling our children happens as we live life with them. Family discipleship isn’t just sitting around a bible together for family devotionals or driving to church together on a Sunday morning. Family discipleship is living life together, looking for every opportunity to share with our children and teach our children. I’m reminded of when Paul wrote to the Thessalonians:

“just as a nursing mother cares for her children, so we cared for you. Because we love you so much, we were delighted to share with you not only the gospel of God but our lives as well.”

1 Thessalonians 2:7-8, (NIV)

As parents we love our children, we desire to help our children, and we long to see them grow up and be successful. Part of how we do that is through discipleship – sharing with them not just the gospel, not just a bible story; but through sharing life together with them, allowing them to see God at work in us as a family.

You Have Already Been Empowered

Family discipleship may seem daunting at this point. The good news is that you have been empowered to be a witness and to make disciples. God has already given you what you need to disciple your kids.

Acts 1:8 tells us:

“But you will receive power when the holy Spirit has come upon you, and you will be my witnesses in Jerusalem and in all Judea and Samaria, and to the end of the earth.”

Acts 1:8 (ESV)

Before His ascension into heaven, Jesus promised His disciples that they would receive the power of the Holy Spirit to help them in their earthly ministry. This same promise holds true to us today. As Christians, we have been given the Holy Spirit to empower us to live like Christ. The Holy Spirit empowers us to fulfill our calling, and make disciples.

Too often we over think this.

What does it mean to be a witness?

Being a witness to Christ is simply sharing what he’s done. When I think of this verse I often think of a witness in a court trial. That witness isn’t there to play the part of the lawyer, judge, or jury. Their sole job is to simply share what they saw, heard, or experienced. At the end of the day, the witness isn’t responsible for the final outcome. The witness is only responsible for sharing what happened so that others will know.

In the case of parenthood and family discipleship we aren’t responsible for controlling every detail. We don’t carry the weight of the outcome. We are not God and cannot pretend to be. As Parents, we are responsible for sharing, every chance we get, who God is, what He says, and what he’s done in our lives so that our children will see and come to experience Him as well. I cannot save my children from sin, only God can. Salvation is a miracle worked by God. As parents, we get to play a part in that miracle through discipleship.

From Genesis to Revelation, God has given promises to be with us every step of the way. Not once did he ever say parenthood is a different story. He hasn’t left you to parent alone.

you are not alone.

The all-powerful God is with us through the Holy Spirit and is empowering us each and every day. Through every season. Through tears and laughter, through every unknown, he wants us to turn to Him. He wants to empower us to make disciples in our homes, he wants to empower us for each moment. He wants to disciple us and teach us so that we can disciple and teach our children.

If we allow God to disciple us (through our prayers, reading His word, etc.) He will show us how to disciple our children as we live out His call on our lives, both individually and as a family. He is there to help us. The Holy Spirit will guide us and lead us as we lead our children into His truth. He helps us so we can confidently say, like Paul: follow me as I follow Christ (1 Corinthians 1:11)

Want to learn more about family discipleship? Check out the 4 basic principles in this blog post.

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